comme la terre en guerre

If anyone out there is interested in putting together a re-enactment of one of the many battles that formed defining moments of World War I or II, they are welcome to come on over. Our garden is the perfect landscape for a Sunday afternoon revival of, for example, Vimy Ridge. Trenches and mud are included in the deal and I'm sure we could whistle up some mouldy old biscuits for authentic refreshments. For a small extra fee, the fans currently at work in the interior of the house, trying desperately to keep the damp from invading too deep into the central space, could be diverted outside to provide a windswept ambience, perhaps even gusty. Rain is forecast for the weekend, allowing keeners a rare opportunity to tell their granchildren, they were pretend "there".

This opportunity will not last, as the trenches will be filled in within a week or two with pipes, gravel and soil, and the water will be diverted through the aforementioned pipes into a new sump. There is even a rumour that the rain might let up and the sun might return for a day or two This, however, is treated by jaded locals as a cruel hoax and not to be taken with much seriousness.

Interested parties are to reply to this post. Fees vary from the 'helping us out with the ultimate cost of this drainage disaster' to the 'saving our bacon' options.